Conflicting Desires
Through our healthy human desires, we initiate the forward movement of life. It is perplexing when these desires seem to run out of steam and sometimes die altogether. If you’ve started diets with strong resolve that soon fades, you know how frustrating this problem with desire can be. It is a problem of vital concern in the struggle with any type of stubborn temptation.
I’m sure you’ve noticed that a potent desire to eat healthfully and lose weight comes along only sporadically. It seems that a powerful desire just happens once in a while; we can’t create it or control it. Many of us have completed at least one, temporarily successful, diet. When it comes time to diet again, the enthusiasm of the first time is hard to get back. We wish for health and fitness all the time, but wishing doesn’t mean we’re willing to work for it. The problem is, our desire for self-improvement is fluctuating and unstable.
Why is genuine desire for self-improvement so sporadic? We humans always seem to be in conflict with our higher and lower natures. Unfortunately, the lower nature is so stubborn. It is very difficult to extricate yourself from the grip of a lower desire once it has taken hold, especially if it is a natural tendency. Once the thought of overeating enters your mind, it becomes a slippery slope to the action itself.
Does this seem familiar? The thought of food enters your mind. Your attention becomes riveted to the thought. The longer the thought sticks in your mind, the more you are tempted. Good excuses for indulgence pop into your mind. You turn to fight the temptation with reasons why you shouldn’t. If that doesn’t work, you bring out an arsenal of affirmations. You say to yourself: I like knowing I’m burning fat for energy ... I can coexist with tempting food ... Food is not so important to me anymore ... I’m more powerful than food. Alas, you can’t find a foothold upon which to stand. The desire for food wipes out your higher inclinations, and you can hardly remember why you want to lose weight. The desire for change, and the miserable effects of the habit, all fade. You can’t get a grip. Your mind is a confusing tangle except for the thought of eating. You may as well give in.
So much of life is wasted in this recurring battle. As soon as we find ourselves arguing with temptation, the likelihood of victory is small. Immediate gratification always seems to win out over the argument for deferred gratification. We can’t just substitute a higher desire for a lower desire. We can’t battle a lower desire by trying to summon power from a higher desire. We’re in constant conflict, at war in ourselves. It’s a prison of inner conflict.
Years of this kind of conflict weaken us to the point where we lack the freedom to choose the higher desire. Lack of freedom is the defining characteristic when someone is compulsive about food. We frequently hear people say, “Oh, don’t put that candy dish near me!” The thought of the candy will dominate that person’s mind while they sit there. Eating is no longer a choice. It’s compulsory.
So how do we escape this perpetual inner conflict? If arguing with temptation doesn’t work, what will? Can we successfully strengthen our higher desires? Before I talk about the effective answer to these questions, let’s look at motives.
Save me, O God,
for the waters have come up to my neck.
I sink in deep mire, where there is no foothold
Psalm 69:1–2a
